Tuesday, 20 August 2013

Attack From Behind: BLEACH Meets Call of Duty, FINALE

Let's tackle the rest of this quaint little fic we're all far superior to

When last we left off
  • More random ghost sex from extremely forced pairings
  • Senna from Movie 1 helps the our men in uniform
  • Ichigo's family held to ransom him to unlock Soul Society for slaughter! They should have just waited for the following Tuesday, SS was already naturally due for another apocalypse
  • Russia in turmoil from civil war! Will IMRAN ZAKHAEV's name sound even eviler, now that the ultranationalist insurgency has reached its apex?
  • The military of the nation of heroes mounts its attack on AL-ASAD's jihadist compound, but he managed to slip away! Meanwhile, insanely powerful gods among men Kariya, Gin and Aizen twiddle their thumbs as they watch their puny human comrade in awe.
  • Hinamori is Hitsugaya's new lieutenant, as paperwork is a foremost priority during a time of crisis and leaving a division without a captain or a vice captain is an amazing idea
  • The Gotei 13 discovers Aizen's illicit stash of nuclear warhead blueprints and... and...

Although I can see why they'd want to censor such photos
More shock and terror and ghost boobs after the jump

Chapter 13: WARPIG

(A/N: Ballbreaker by AC/DC. From the album Ballbreaker. But I will preferred using the No Bull Director's Cut DVD as the song because the song from the album is like almost too slow.)
You could say the slowness is a real... ball


The military men of valor do something military and valorous that is no concern to us, save for the reaction of the Bad Guy Council of Bounts, Kariya and Yoshi
The chopper then lifts back up in the air and flies away from the city as the guys of the tank see them.
"Good luck, guys. And come on home.", the tank commander said.
But what did they do not know, is that both Karyina and Yoshi were looking at it with an evil grin on there face.
"So everything's going good as I knew it. Seems like Zakahev will get his chance at killing thousands of marines in one strike.", Karyina said.
"I guess Zakahev will win this after all.", Yoshi said.
"But don't worry. Like I said, Zakahev will do the same to Rukongai and destroy the Soul Society for good.", Karyina said.
"This is a show I gotta see.", Yoshi said.
"We better tell Aizen that this one we cannot miss.", Karyina said.
"Right.", Yoshi said as they disappear out of sight.
Whose sight did they disappear from?

At the Oval Office

Back in Washington D.C., inside the White House, the president was over looking some papers at his desk in the oval office when officers arrive inside.
"Mr. President, we got news.", the officer said.
"What is it?", the president asked.
"We got a lead on Al-Asad. He's in Al-Basrah, Iraq.", the other officer said.
"What's he doing there?", the president asked.
"We have no idea. We think he probably left Mecca before our forces arrive there to attack.", the officer said.
That's probably the idea to have, officer

"All right. Send in reinforcements from Kuwait to Al-Basrah. Order half the fleet to the Persian Gulf. Seems like we're going to start another Gulf War.", the president said.
"Yes, sir.", the officers said as they leave the office.
"I hope I did the right thing.", the president said.
Our stalwart Commander in Chief is a man of great deliberation
At the Las Noches Palace, in Hueco Mundo, Sosuke Aizen inside his throne room when Gin approach towards him.
"Aizen, we just got word that the marines are now heading to Al-Basrah, Iraq. It means they're going towards a trap.", Gin said.
"Good. So Zakahev will get his chance then.", Aizen said.
"I believe everyone will expect this to see it for the first time.", Gin said.
"All right. Have all the Arrancar be prepare for this. I cannot miss this seeing a single bodies of marines killed.", Aizen said.
"Yes, sir.", Gin said as he leaves.
Hey Aizen, I think the one Arrancar who can suck people's souls out of their bodies will be sufficient


A/N: Here's a new chapter. This by the way contains a little sexuality.
Just a pinch

Preparations for Gulf War Mark II, of which the most salient back and forth is undoubtedly

"We're all praying for this. Let's rest for a long time because we're heading to the Persian Gulf. Hoo-Awh?", Vazquez asked.
"Hoo-Awh!", the soldiers said.
After the conversation, the rest of the men then walks to their quarters to rest as they get set for long trip to the Persian Gulf.
Incidentally that's also the sound one makes after getting punched in the hoo-awh (yet another of the mysteries of life)
Back at Karakura Town, inside the Urahara Shop, Kitsue, Yoruichi, Yasutora, and Uryu were talking to one another about the situation of Ichigo's kidnapped family.
"I couldn't believe it.", Uryu said.
"How did they kidnapped Ichigo's sisters and his father?", Yasutora asked.
"When Ichigo's family were in Hawaii for vacation, I've believe that they were follow by them. Not really sure how.", Urahara said.
"My thoughts think that they were followed the night before they went on the trip,", Yoruichi said.
Yoruichi is so smart she enjoys nested thinking

Also, why is everybody so flabbergasted by the mundane ass feats this fucker pulls? It's not unheard of to, I dunno, spy on people, Urahara?
"What do they want?", Yasutora asked.
"The King Seal.", Urahara said.
"What?", both Yasutora and Uryu asked.
"You know what I'm talking about. The one that the 13 Court Guard Squads that try to blame Captain Hitsugaya for it.", Urahara said.
Ohhhhhhh, not the King's Key, the fucking King's Seal from Movie 2!! Ahahahahaha

For anyone that doesn't remember, that was the Hitsu-centric movie that had him on the run after seemingly turning coat to join the side of his evil lost comrade. It was the lowest score I gave any anime-only material with an abyssal 2.5/10. The King's Seal was the retarded plot macguffin of that movie, and it granted the user the power of INFINITE WAAAAAAANK
"I want to know how people from the real world knows about the Soul Society besides Ichigo?", Uryu asked.
"That's a good question. But don't know about that yet.", Urahara said.
It's Aizen you idiot

Up in heaven...
Back in the Soul Society, inside the 10th Division Barracks, Hitsugaya was in his office looking over some stuff while Hinamori, the new lieutenant of the 10th Division, was working in her new office with renovations going on.
Soldiers as well helped her out by taking Rangiku Matsumoto's name tag in the trash can and her name scraching off the door of her office as well.
They also began cleaning out her desk as well when they open one of the desk cabinets and got out numerous sake bottles that were stored in her desk.
"My god. How much bottles are in there?", the soldier asked.
Rangiku doesn't chill her booze apparently

Though she does have to endure a chilly exchange!
Back in Kakaura Town, Ichigo's house, Ichigo was cleaning everything off the floors of his house and the clinic after that big time situation with the Ultranationlists soldiers, entering his home and revealing the family of his that got him in a big time situation.
"Don't worry, I'm coming to save you. I don't know where are you guys are.", Ichigo thought.
"Ichigo.", a voice said as his thoughts snaps and looks up to see Matsumoto entering the room.
"Oh, hey.", Ichigo said.
"Are you okay, Ichigo?", Rangiku asked.
"I'm fine.", Ichigo said.
"Look, I'm sorry that your family was kidnapped. Will try to find them.", Rangiku said.
"You sure about that. Their probably somewhere else. If you think that you're going with me, you can forget it. I'm going by myself and that's final.", Ichigo said.
"I will go with you whether you like it or not.", Rangiku said.
"Let me put it this way, you've been banished from the Soul Society. You not even a lieutenant no more. Even worst, you don't have your sword no more. And it figures why Toshiro doesn't like you no more because you're too lazy to do his job.", Ichigo said when Rangiku slaps him in the face.
"Let me tell you something, I've been a lieutenant for years. I've care about my captain for a long time. Before you came, I'd been a friend through all my life. Even your other friends as well. I on the other hand made the biggest mistake of my life. Now, I'm not a lieutenant no more because I made a mistake. Now I'm a nobody.", Rangiku said.
"You're still beautiful.", Ichigo said.
Did I miss a beat here or did they streamline the efficiency of their makeup sex protocol

After boob-smothering-that-exists-only-in-fiction gag #34,890
"My God, can you stop doing that for once! You almost kill me with your giant breasts!", Ichigo yells.
"Well, come on. You said that I was beautiful.", Rangiku said.
"I know that. It was just a figure of speech.", Ichigo said.
Then it hit Matusmoto's mind when she reliazed something that Ichigo could be falling in love with someone.
"Ichigo, ...are you in love with me?", Rangiku asked.
"WHAT? What are you talking about?", Ichigo asked.
"Come on, Ichigo. I know that deep down you do love me. Now admitted.", Rangiku said.
"No I do not all right. Now get off my back and leave me alone.", Ichigo said as he walks upstairs.
He's a teenage boy, Rangiku. Trust us, he ain't in love with you.
"Where are you going?", Rangiku asked.
"Going to take a shower. And don't cause any thing stupid because I just clean up around here.", Ichigo said.
Suddenly, Matusmoto then had a smirk on her face as she knows where he was going.
"Don't worry about it. Because your mine.", Rangiku said as she walks off from the living room.
Ah but she DOES know
A/N: Hey guys, it's been a while. Sorry for the long delay. School has been really been bothering me throughout the rest of the month. But now it's finally over and the summer is here. But next year, I will become a senior for my final year of school. But that's next year.
Dude, I don't want to be mean. But your grammar is godawful for a high school senior.


A/N: Here's a new chapter. This by the way will have both the battle scenes and the sex scenes at the same time. Going to get a little interesting.
Ladies and gentlemen, methinks we are in for a treat

And we're off!!
Back in Ichigo's house, inside the bathtub, while the shower was running, after confessing their love to one another, both Ichigo and Matsumoto decided to do the unthinkable by making love to one another.

Ichigo: This shower sure is wet. The wetness is reminding me of Rangiku's primary attractive quality. I love Rangiku so much the water is going pat-a-pat on my penile erection, which if I am not careful will sprout its own furrowed brow.

Rangiku: But Ichigo, what about your family

Ichigo: What family

Rangiku: That's so hot. I tender the proposition to do the unthinkable

Ichigo: I have come under the impression that such a decision would indeed be a wise course of action. Sign in triplicate?

Rangiku: You steamy hunk!
Ichigo was the one to strike first as he pick her up by her legs and pinned her on the shower wall which is already wet.
Rookie mistake! You have to hook her nipples onto the space between the shower wall tiles if you want any traction
He began to kiss her lips real deep then place his tongue inside her mouth and both tongues licks one another, fighting for control when after a couple of seconds, they were both losing oxygen and quickly got their tongues out of either mouths and were breathing hard after that.
I don't think there's ever been a hotter description of a passionate snog than ''both tongues licking one another''
"Man, I never knew you were much of a good kisser.", Rangiku said, breathing hard.
"Well, hey... blame my father.", Ichigo said, breathing hard.
I... I don't want to know.
"Don't worry, because we're just getting started.", Rangiku said.
"And it's still my turn to attack.", Ichigo said as he grabs her and the two were on the ground of the tub, began kissing one another to find out who has the best attack maneuver.
Of course for Ichigo, on the outside, he was a caring person. But on the inside, he was a dirty perverted person as well.
Rock N Roll Train went on to win a Pulitzer for this portrayal of the conflicted nature of man

I bet his attack maneuvers unlocked the dormant quincy fullbringer fox person within him
Ichigo slides his tongue all around in Matusmoto's neck as she was moaning.
But that wasn't enough when she suddenly began biting her finger with her eyes close, struggling not to scream, Ichigo stuck his finger in her "Honey Pot" with her wet honey juices, leaking out of her towards the tub floor.
Wtf, Ichigo, do you have a cat tongue or something?
"Ichigo.", Rangiku moan.
"Fuck, my finger is hot. I can even feel your juices as well.", Ichigo nuzzles her neck while kissing it.
''I can feel your inner honey on my finger because of the fantastic, scarcely believable wonder that is the human tactile sensory nervous system!''

''Fuck I'm cumming''

Later, a magical whisper of romance in the night...
"You got a nice ass.", Ichigo said, whispers.
"Once again, you are such a perverted man.", Rangiku said.
Suddenly, Ichigo slides down a little as he see non other than her "flower", which is all still both wet and sticky after he put his finger inside it to make her warm in her body.
"Man, your flower still smells great.", Ichigo said, smelling it.
It's enough to make me swoon
"You want to eat out of me?" Rangiku asked as she sits up and with her knees on the bed, locking him, she puts her hands and opens it up wide for him to see. "Then please... lick me harder."
No Ichigo not the fork

Meanwhile, over by where the men don't rock any six packs
"We got a message from the ultranationlists.", they said, pulling out a letter.
"Ultranationlists? What the hell are they doing sending messages to us? I thought the British were suppose to deal with them?", he asked, looking at the letter.
"It was a threat by an unknown leader.", they said.
"As in what threat?", he asked.
"A warning to the United States as in us.", they said.
Really puts the U.S. in us
"A fire shower of retaliation to the ultranationslists. That's what the unknown leader said. Which means that if the United States provoked the Ultranationlists Army and interferes in our civil war against the Loyalists, they will launch mutliple nuclear missiles towards our country.", the person said.
"Of course. We're not in their business. Only the British can interfere. Not us. We signed an agreement we should be allies but in seperate wars.", he said.
''And as you well understand, agreements between two countries can never be redrafted as a situation evolves.''
"It gets worse.", they said.
"What do you mean?", he asked.
"One of our U.S. Space Recon satellites were spying over Russia and found that one of the missile bases in Russia were quickly capture and now they're using as a first line of defense. That base by the way has multiple intercontinental ballistic missiles in there.", the person said, handing photos of the base to him.
"Jesus Christ.", he said, looking at them.
"Those ballistic missiles can reach towards everywhere in the world. Except the west coast of our country.", they said.
"All right, I'll see if I can get the president over to the oval office.", he said, giving the pictures back to the people.
"Thanks.", they said as the assistant walks out of his office and heads to the situation room.
ICBMs are always rife for the plucking and don't need to be prepared in anyway before mobilization
Back in Ichigo's, Ichigo and Matsumoto continues to explore their sex to one another when Ichigo gets up weaker off the bed and drags her towards him where she wraps her legs around him not to let go.
"I know it's going to hurt a little.", Ichigo said, breathing hard.
"It will. Please, give me enough orgasm.", Rangiku said, breathing hard.
He leans over and kiss her harder as she kissed back as well.
"Well, here goes nothing.", Ichigo said.
Don't you dare draw shy of Rangiku's orgasm quota, Ichigo

Speaking of which, we tie all of our plot threads in a shuddering crescendo

"Come on.", the president said.
"Hurry.", Prince said.
"I'm cumming.", Rangiku moaning.
"Almost got it.", one of the nest team said.
"All U.S. forces, be advised. We have a nuclear threat in the city. NEST teams are on site. I repeat,...
And finally... 0...
An explosion occurs from palace as the nuclear device finally came up and the impact was coming towards them.
^^One of these things is not like the other, one of these things just doesn't belong^^

Can you imagine if they added a random orgasm to some dire montage of destruction in a nuke movie. Though I guess you could say she had a really EXPLOSIVE killing innumerable innocent people I mean orgasm (sorry, it's easy to mix up the two)
Finally, both Ichigo and Matsumoto explodes as they're juices spatters on to one another with her screaming and he falls on top of her with bodies full of heavy sweat.
What are you two, hippos? Did I just switch on the Discovery Channel here

The very next line--
The impact from the nuke destroys every building in its way and bodies were getting vaporize. Vehicles were flying and turn over as well and palm trees were getting blown and falls to the ground.
People were in shock inside the situation room as they look and saw the city of Al-Basrah finally destroyed and wipe out off the map.
"My god.", the assistant said.
Everyone were in silence as one of the generals get on the phone to command.
"Command... Do you read?", the general asked.
"No response?", the president asked.
"Nothing... phones lines are cut.", the general said.
"What we do? There's gotta be something we can do!", the assistant said.
"There's nothing we can do.", the president said.
Everyone just stare at the president as he spoke again.
"Address all armed forces to stand down. Fall back at once.", the president said.
"Yes, sir.", the generals said as they got on the phones.
The president then leaves the situation room in a misable way after he failed.
That president's ignoble blight for the ages, the way in which he left the room was not noticeably dramatic enough
Captain Prince, Gaz, Soap, and Senna were in shock after they see the city gone as well with marines in there dead.
"How many troops are dead in the city right now?", Soap asked.
"Millions of troops.", Gaz said.
"Just imaging of what's it going to be like when American families of their love ones dead. And how many funerals that they are going to have.", Prince said.
"Can't believe what I just saw.", Senna said, in a state of shock.
"And can you believe that orgasm and the skill with which that random fucking occurred? There will obviously be a celebration with fireworks for each funeral just to commemorate that one orgasm"
Inside the Kurosaki Medic, inside Ichigo's room, the scent of sex were spreading in that room as the moonlight shines in the room and the bodies on the bed.
Matsumoto finally let out her virginity of a human boy from the real world which is also a substitute shinigami.
I hope you know at this point you're unfairly forcing me to read you
"I can't believe that was the first time I had sex. And for the first time, it was a boy from the real world.", Rangiku thought as she looks at the sleeping form of Ichigo who has his arms around her.
No kidding, Rangiku. I can't believe it either.

Meanwhile, in Las Noches
In Hueco Mundo, inside Aizen's throne room of Las Noches, Aizen was sitting down just minding his business when Ulquiorra enters the room.
Which leads one to wonder what Aizen does when he's sitting on his throne, minding his own business. Perhaps his thoughts stray toward Rangiku's luscious ghost rack and his hakama gets a little tighter
"Aizen.", he said.
"What is it?", Aizen asked.
"Just got word from the real world by Zakahev.", Ulquiorra said.
"Yes.", Aizen said.
"The nuclear device that was planted by Al-Asad has exploded and destroyed the city where the marines were. Their all dead as we heard.", Ulquiorra said.
"Tell Zakahev and Al-Asad I bid them congratulations to them on their accomplishment.", Aizen said.
"Yes, sir.", Ulquiorra said as he walks off out of the throne.
"Seems like the plan is going great. Now must figure out our next plan of action.", Aizen thought, smirking.
"I've got it, this time we'll let Asad do everything once again!"
Inside the dome of the fortress, Gin saw the action of both Ichigo and Matsumoto on the screen.
After that, he was extreamly angry as he got his eyes on Ichigo.
"I'm going to kill that human with my bare hands!", Gin yells as he smashes the screen with even more anger.
Here Gin acts lulzily out of character, as we all know it wouldn't be with his hands that he smashed the porn window, unless you count the hands as the swinging vector
Tatishchevo Nuclear Missile Base- Tasishchevo, Russia
Outskirts of the small city of Tasishchevo, the nuclear missile base taken over by Ultranationlist soldiers, Irman Zakahev watches his troops celebrates after hearing the news of the nuclear blast in the city of Al-Basrah by firing their weapons in the air.
"Now the real thing begins as we will bring forth the Soviet Union again to this beautiful country.", Zakahev said.
The celebration continues as they reveal ballistic missiles being loaded in the missile silos as Zakehev watches it with a smirk.
We must keep up the arms race against Ichigo's penis!!!

I'm having far too much fun with this

The Marine who mentioned he had sired offspring earlier, naturally rakes a dramatic death scene
After that, he then falls to the ground and looks up at the orange red blood sky where his eyes were turning white slowly as he was dying.
But just when he was about to die, a voice came up on his mind.
"Daddy... I love you."
It was the sound of his daughter's voice for the last time as he finally dies in the city.
''Don't worry, Matilda, I'm going to a happy place where oh fuck.' Okay what is this bullshit. Whatever you do, Matty, NEVER DIE!!''
A/N: Finally got this chapter done. Sorry for the long delay as I had other stuff to worry about before my senior year begins in one month.
But it's good to be back to get this chapter done.
Anyway, you all know the news about Modern Warfare 2 coming out in November 11th, 2009. I can't wait for the game to come out.
Like I said, I will get this story done before the school year begins. Soon people.
I hope you like it... and by the way... the commit which is "A Shower of Fire of Nuclear Retaliation" was by non other than Kim Jong II, North Korea's leader who launched multiple medium range missiles on the fourth of July.
Hope and pray we don't go into a nuclear war with North Korea.
Because NK totally had the capacity for such a thing


A/N: Here's a new chapter. I decided to add instead of Urahara/Yoruichi, but Byakuya/Yoruichi.
And let me give everyone advice to all readers right now because I'm really not in the mood. Couple days ago, three reviewers insulted me on this story and I'm not going to be insulted like that.
The next person that gives me a big time real angry review with any bad stuff on it, I can promise you I will report this and deleted off the review pages. Because I'm not going to let that happened again and put up like that again.
All right,... thank you.
AUTHENTICATE MY EXISTENCE AND THEN GO AWAY, apart from your due validation of my awesome writing your value as feedback is moot. This is to be a one way road of praise with no engaging readers and their concerns whatsoever. Look, I'm rubbing one out to stock footage of Iwo Jima right now and this is so correct that it is hereby decreed that everyone must do so after every meal just like me

One must keep in mind that after writing this fic, this man went on to be a bright new college hopeful
The news continues to spread throughout day and night as the world witness the nuclear blast killing millions of Marines in the city.
The United States were in even more shock as millions of telegrams were being sent to homes of love ones and funeral plans were being made in every cemetery in their hometowns.
Even mass hysteria was around as churches in the country were pack with everyone in line with confessions to make up thinking its the end of the world.
The bomb was so devastating it blasted America back to the year 1926
In the Soul Society, newly 10th Division Lieutenant Momo Hinomori was in her office doing all the paperwork that Captain Hitsugaya assign her to do.
"Man. I wonder how long this paperwork can be done?", Momo asked to herself while writing at the same time.
Suddenly, she saw the door opening as Captain Hitsugaya enters to her office and walks up to her desk.
"Hinomori.", Toshiro said.
"Captain Hitsugaya, sir.", Momo said.
"Is all the paperwork for the 13th Division is ready and finish?", Toshiro said.
"Yes, sir.", Momo said.
"Can I see it?", Toshiro asked.
"Here.", Momo said as he hands him the paperwork to see.
"Good. That's good.", Toshiro said.
"Should I give them to you?", Momo asked.
"Yes. I need them all to me. One of the 13th Division seated officers which neither Kiyone or Sentaro could come. I hope is Kiyone.", Toshiro said.
"Why?", Momo asked.
"Because you know how they are. One of them is trying to become the best to empress Captain Ukitake. It makes it worst for him because he's suffering from tuberculosis.", Toshiro said.
Suddenly, they both sense something as a Hell Butterfly flies to the window and inside the office.

Mayuri researches Aizen's nuke blueprints. Nemu and Hisagi go out on a date, only to be spied upon by Kira!
"So, I knew it all along what Shuhei was keeping. He's going out with Nemu Kurotsuchi, the lieutenant of the 12th Division. Man, I wonder what's it going to be like when Captain Kurotsuchi reacts if he finds out about this.", Izuru thought.
"I better warn him sooner or later."
He then decided to follow them to try to warn Shuhei.
Those millions of souls can wait, we can't have Captain Kurotsuchi become slightly miffed on the offchance he gives a shit about this

Ichigo wakes up next to ghost boobs and
While looking at her the way she's asleep, Ichigo then has an idea. He grabs a black marker and slowly lays next to her and slides down towards her "honey pot".
"It smells.", Ichigo whispers.
Well there goes your chance to get laid ever again. Now the only people who will ever grace your bed are Quinzi footsoldiers
He grabs the black marker and opens the tip of it and then begins to write a flower just next to her parts then places an arrow that point towards her "honey pot." (Holy fucking shit.)
After which he was forced to leave everything behind and run without looking back into the shadows of the sewers as a morlock
"So I knew it all along. You are in love with that big breasted woman.", a voice in his mind said.
"Oh, great! What is it you want?", Ichigo asked as he other mind comes out as Hollow Ichigo.
(Bolding not mine)

''C'mon! Just one go!''
"I just want to say congratulations. I thought you were gay at first. But now, I think I was wrong about you. And you know what, I think you finally found the right girl.", Hollow Ichigo said.
"Hey, mind your own business, okay. And another thing, I'm not gay!", Ichigo yells, while putting on black shorts and a Detroit Red Wings Hedrik Zetterberg Jersey.
The Detroit Red Wings are HUGE in Japan, didn't you know?
"Ah, here we go again with the fucking Detroit Red Wings Jersey with the 2009 Stanley Cup Finals Patch.", Hollow Ichigo said.
"Is there a problem talking about my fucking team?", Ichigo said.
"I do. Like the way this year when Sidney Crosby and the Pittsburgh Penguins beat the fucking hell out of them in Detroit and raising the Stanley Cup in front of Hockeytown people.", Hollow Ichigo said while laughing.
Dropping all pretenses of Ichigo caring about his family, are we
"So tell me? How did it feel when you had me in bed with you?", Rangiku asked, rubbing his "member"
"Oh, god... it felt... great.", Ichigo moaned.
"Oh did it... even when you're father decided that when I was his girlfriend back then.", Rangiku said.
"What? How do you know my father?", Ichigo asked.
"Oh that's a different story. Because, Ichigo, you're father--", Rangiku said.
''Is MEEEE!!!''
"Hello! Anyone home? We're back", Rukia said as they heard her voice coming from downstairs.
"Oh, fuck! She's back! Quick, don't just stand there. Find some clothes. Or better yet, go in the shower to clean yourself.", Ichigo said.
"Oh, alright.", Rangiku said as she let's go of him.
"Thank you.", Ichigo said when she put a finger on his lips.
"Just don't forget about last night.", Rangiku said as she presses her lips to his, sliding her tongue in his mouth while Ichigo was sliding his in hers.
They later catch there breaths after the kiss.
"You go on downstairs to distract Rukia. I'll go take a bath. And let's keep this a secret from her.", Rangiku said.
"Ok.", Ichigo said as she pecks his cheek and walks to the bathroom.
"Well, like what she just said... keep this a secret.", Ichigo said as he walks downstairs to the living room.
But what of the pivotal Detroit Red Wings tiff?
"Ichigo. It's Orihime.", she said on the other line.
"Orihime. Hey.", Ichigo said.
"Have you heard what happened?", Orihime asked.
"Heard what?", Ichigo asked.
"On the news, a nuclear blast killed thousands of United States Marines in Iraq. Everyone in the world are protesting. Even in Tokyo.", Orihime said.
"You're serious. When this happened?", Ichigo asked.
"Last night here in Japan. Afternoon in Iraq.", Orihime said.
"Wow. I didn't know that.", Ichigo said.
"I know. Now, everyone here are scare that it could happened. The Emperor of Japan annouce a major fallout shelter just outside Tokyo for a possible nuclear attack. I'm a little scare though.", Orihime said.
The Emperor of the country that we currently live in, which, if you need to be reminded, is Japan, waved a magical wand and now there's a major fallout shelter for the entire population of the Tokyo metropolitan area. Every other Japanese person can rot in Shitburg, Hell

Also, what is it exactly the people are protesting? And is it thousands or millions of Marines?
"If anyone joining with us right now, on the screen to your left is the speech at the UN building in New York City with other members from around the world are responding to the devastating nuclear attack that kill thousands of American Marines in Al-Basrah who by the way, announced that Khalad Al-Asad committed suicide during the invasion. But more bodies continue to rise up as the casualty rate continues to climb up as well.", the reporter said.
"Hey, Al-Asad is dead. He committed suicide by denoting the bomb.", Ichigo said.
"So I guess he didn't want to be capture. So he did the impossible.", Rukia said.
"We will show you on how the blast of the city that the International Space Station recorded and let me tell you something, the blast was unbelieveable as we show it to you right now.", the reporter said.
The video once showing from the satellite view as the nuclear blast appears and the impact ran through the entire city with smoke everywhere.
"Wow. That's unbelievable.", Rukia said.
Rukia is a very suggestible person

They vow to find a way to save Ichigo's family by heading to Urahara's, with Rangiku barely restraining her anger at hearing that she was replaced as lieutenant, Rukia wondering what's going on between Rangiku and Ichigo, and Renji looking to Rukia with his typical confused glances. Meanwhile millions of Marine souls cry forgotten, swirling in a vortex of despair beneath Soul Society's tea parties


Byakuya's Dream
In his Dream, he finally wakes up from the same bed his currently in. He could feel sweat around his body and even on the bed as he gets up slowly and sits up looking around and feeling his forehead.
"What's wrong with me?" Byakuya asked. "Why is it hot that much?"
He can't stand the summer rush with a big time hot day with the temperature coming up higher than every.
But with the summer rush continues to come up, he then notice something. The smell
"What's that smell?"
A honey pot flower anywordbesidesvagina?
He then got up off the bed and walks to the front door of the room as the smell continues to grow higher. He slides the door open and notice that the courtyard of his mansion was destroyed and cover in fire.
"What the...?"
Ugh, he said cover it with a tarp, not fire, a tarp
The fish in his pond were dead as they rise up in the surface and the water was covered in green water.
Dude I know you don't see your servants as human beings but don't mistake them for dead fish!

My captain got his tendency to mistake people for lifeless guppies from ME, Abarai Renji!!
He yells for his servants when non of them came or even responded.
"What are they doing?"
He gets angry noticing they probably lazy to not come. So he decided to walk towards the other rooms where he was shock to find their bodies mutated with big brains coming out from the tip of their heads.
Well, at least we can rest assured their big brains aren't springing forth from parts of the body apart from the tip of the head.
"Captain. Please help us...", one of the servants beg.
Byakuya couldn't do nothing but to watch them suffered.
As long as you don't count dancing in place as something worth mentioning, then yeah, Byakuya couldn't do a thing while watching the peasants suffer
Another of his servants appears from the courtyard as a young woman was dying with severe burns with her entire bodies. Another was vomiting in the courtyard on the wooden.
He then has no choice but to leave his mansion to look if the other people including Captains and Lieutenants were still alive as he walks to the exit of the mansion doors and in a big shock to himself, Rukongai was destroyed with buildings damage, on fire that created the skies turning red.
"What happened here?"
Just like what happened in Al-Basrah, it was the same thing and the same attack.
If Byakuya's not careful now, he could let loose an emotion
He looks everywhere and what he saw was a mushroom cloud hovering above Seireitei as he notice that both Seireitei and Sokyoku Hill were gone and destroyed by something that has the Mushroom cloud hovering.
And then suddenly, in a shocking discovery, Byakuya witness what he saw... the captains and the lieutenants bodies on the ground dead with bodies burned to crisp... he even saw Captain Unohana's body in a puddle of water with blood mixing it together.
And in another shocking discovery, he saw Rukia's body crush to death in the rocks debris, seeing her arm out there.
Byakuya couldn't believe what he was seeing as he also sense something from the red skies.
He looks up and saw a star blinks from the skies as he notice something coming straight down towards Rukongai.
In the skies, a RS-24 Surface-to-Surface missile was heading towards Rukongai.
When it breach the atomsphere, the tip of the missile, opens up and multiple missiles came out and follows to Rukongai.
 Why couldn't Ichigo and friends invaded SS by way of RS-24 Surface-to-Surface missile? A wasted opportunity
Byakuya was running to get his sword to try to stop the multiple missiles, but he was too late.
The missiles finally hits Rukongai. Creating multiple impacts all over the city, destroying more buildings and vaporizing dead bodies as well.
Byakuya sees the impact as he eyes were wide and came straight towards him.
End of Dream
Suddenly in real life, Byakuya finally shot up in bed as he open his big eyes with sweat covering his body.
He quickly looks around and shot up to the doors of his bedroom as he see the courtyard in a normal condition with fishes swimming in the pond, his servants walking around waving at him, and the weird smell just normal smell, and the skies were clear blue skies.
But to make matters worst, he doesn't like the summer rush with the higher temperatures.
"How long will this summer ends?", he asked himself as he walks back to him room.
The thing we are to take from this is that Byakuya doesn't like the heat and that the same nuclear blowout happening again would also be bad
"So is everyone here?", Yamamoto asked.
"We're all here, sir.", Toshiro said.
"Good. Because the reason I brought you here is a special assignment for everyone. We have learned that both former Captains Aizen, Ichimaru, and Tosen are located in Hueco Mundo where they are making there army the Arrancar.", Yamamoto said.
"So what does this mean?", Shunsui asked.
"It means that they planned something that we don't know at this moment. But right now, they are branded as traitors to both the Soul Society and the 13 Court Guard Squad.", Yamamoto said.
"You're kidding. Captain Aizen would never do such a thing.", Momo said.
"I'm sorry. But it's true. There's nothing we can do.", Yamamoto said.
"There's has to be a mistake. Maybe he's just playing around.", Momo said.
He's been AWOL without a word, we found evidence of his duplicity and plans for a bomb that just wreaked mass destruction, and we discovered he's now consorting with an army of half-Hollows, but no, yeah, he's definitely just playing around.

Hey this is just a novelty trick sword that makes me numb and my heart stop beating, right?
"Hinomori, there's nothing we can do. He's decided to betray us like this and now he along with Gin and Tosen have both sold themselves to the devil.", Toshiro said.
Hinomori has decided not to talk as she kept her mouth shut with her head down.
"Once again. The three are creating an army call the Arrancar.", Yamamoto said.
"Arrancar?", Ukitake asked.
"An Arrancar is a Hollow that has removed its mask and has gained Shinigami-like powers. The name "Arrancar" is a Spanish verb meaning "to remove" or "to rip off" (The kanji used means "Ripped Mask"), a reference to an Arrancar's removal of its Hollow mask.", Yamamoto said.
"Thank god someone went through the trouble of attaching cool-looking kanji to this term before we headed off to battle."
"Where is Hueco Mundo?", Nanao asked.
"We have no idea on that yet. But right now, that's not what we're here to discuss. For now, the Arrancar are a less threat to us.", Yamamoto said.
 It's right alongside Sniper Island, in the area called

"Yesterday, one of the Research and Development team reported seeing this on there radar while looking around the World of the Living. They saw this as a big powerful explosion that destroyed thousands of people. Including Marines from the United States and the city.", Yamamoto said, with both captains and lieutenants seeing this in a shocking expression.
"That's unbelievable.", Momo said.
"This is why I'm sending you to restive soldiers that died in the battle.
To help them find peace?
We must have an army to try to take down the Arrancar. Will you do that?", Yamamoto asked.

Yamamoto also sends three entirely arbitrary tertiary characters (one of them is Hanatarou if you're curious) to go spy on Rangiku and appraise her worthiness to return to the flock. With her luck she'll be back in SS the moment surface meets surface and everyone's flesh starts peeling off in decidedly unsexy ways

Yoruichi stops by Byakuya's while he prays by Hisana's portrait for a thoughtful invitation to shag
"Anyway, I just came to see how you doing. And I'm going to give you this.", Yoruichi said as she gives him a paper with writing on it.
"What is this?", Byakuya asked, examining it.
"Don't you remember? I gave that paper to you years ago.", Yoruichi said.
"I don't remember anything about.", Byakuya said.
"It's my bathing schedule. You know, the one you read. And you got angry about it.", Yoruichi said, but without looking at him, her devlish smile came.
"Is it okay that I raped your lieutenant?"
"I have a lieutenant?"
"Oh, you mean my remora. Yes, in fact it is proper to rape him, otherwise he'll never learn that it is proper to rape him."
Byakuya examines it once again and then suddenly, a side of Byakuya came snapping as he throws the paper to the wooden floor.
"WHY THIS AGAIN!!! HOW MANY TIMES I TOLD YOU, I'M NOT INTERESTED IN THAT!!!", Byakuya roared as every servants saw him in a sweat drop.
Jeez, you'd think she just propositioned him while he was praying over the shrine to his dead wife or something
Suddenly, he felt something soft and squishy on the left side of his face as he can tell his head is felt by Yoruichi's breasts.
He then get out his Zanpakuto and realize it wasn't there.
"Where's my Zanpakuto?", he asked.
"Oh, Little Byakuya..." he turns around and saw Yoruichi, in the courtyard with his Zanpakuto. "Looking for this?"
"Give it back, Cat-Demon!", Byakuya yells.
"All right... but you have to beat in a game...", Yoruichi said.
"What kind of game?", Byakuya asked.
"You know. Like the one we played... and of course... the one you've never beat me in.", Yoruichi said with a smirk.
"Let me guess... tag.", Byakuya said.
"So you still remember the game. Last time I beat you, you try so close to come closer to me. So let's see what you still got.", Yoruichi said.
Byakuya them smirk and flash steps behind her as he reaches to get his Zanpakuto.
But she reacts fast as flashes quickly as she was behind him, wrapping her arms around him and presses her breasts against his back.
"So. Given up yet? I guess that you still can't beat me.", Yoruichi said.
Byakuya then acts fast as he flashes towards her but Yoruichi flashes to the left.
The game continues on and on through Rukongai throughout the day.
A reminder that Rangiku got instantly banished for postponing paperwork

What happens at the end of their little game of tag? Tenderly, softly
The two for the first time in a hundred years... had sex for the first time, during the rain.
Be sure to dust the cobwebs off your penis for the safest sex

Skipping Chapter 18 because it seems to have been inadvertently replaced with a copy of the prologue chapter (not a difficult mistake to make with ff.net)... we come to our showstopper.


This fic was last updated three years ago and this doesn't seem to offer any conclusion so it's a deadfic.

"Heroes may not be braver than anyone else. They're just brave five minutes
-Ronald Reagan

...Wouldn't that make them braver? God you're dumb, Reagan

Another Yamameeting
"I wonder where's Byakuya? He usually never been late to this meetings before?", Ukitake asked.
"I know. This gotta be the first time he's late.", Shunsui said.
He's realized he's only got one afterlife to afterlive
On the other side of the middle, Acting Captain and Lieutenant Izuru Kira was nervous and sweating in between with to his left the 11th Division Captain Kenpachi Zaraki and his Lieutenant Yachiru Kusajishi on his shoulder.
But that wasn't making him nervous, the only thing that was nevous was to his right was the 12th Division Captain who was has his anger coming up with his creative daughter late.
"Hey, are you all right?", Yachiru asked, who the first saw Izuru.
"Huh? Oh, yeah. I'm fine.", Izuru said.
"You sure?", Yachiru asked.
"Yeah. I'm sure.", Izuru said.
"You know what, I bet it's probably just this really hot summer that's been bothering him.", Kenpachi said.
"Yeah. It is. It's so hot that why we all wearing shinigami uniforms. And there Black, and it makes it more hotter.", Izuru said.
"Yes I understand that. By the way, have you seen Nemu by any chance?", Mayuri asked.
"Not really.", Izuru lied.
"Okay. Just checking. That girl just wanders off, not telling me. That's how I get mad at that wenich.", Mayuri said, getting even more angry.
These uniforms make us so... hot... with their soul-sunlight absorption

If it's really so damn hot Komamura must be dying
"Tell me? What this both RT-2PM Topol and RS-24 Missiles can do?", Soifon asked.
"The RT-2 is a road mobile 3-stage, single warhead ICBM. Its 29.5 meter length and 1.7 meter diameter are approximately the same size and shape as the U.S. Minuteman ICBM. It has a throw-weight of 1000 kg and carries a single warhead with a yield of 550 Kt and accuracy (CEP) of 900m according to Russian sources [as opposed to 300m according to Western sources]. Its road mobile capability gave the RT-2PM Topol an extremely high probability of survival. It can fire from field deployment sites or through sliding roof garage bases.", Mayuri said.
 Thanks a lot, Mayuri, that explanation was a tremendous boon
"So, tell me. What's the rate of the population to be dead here in Rukongai?", Yamamoto asked.
"About everyone here in Rukongai with nobody surviving.", Mayuri said as both the captains and lieutenants were in silence and of course in shock.
 Yeah, callously eliminating unnamed legions of innocent souls for the greater good is Mayuri's job!

They send for Ichigo to find out more about the Real World situation (they haven't got any subscriptions to TV Guide you see, and yes I'll take that joke back with me to 1998)

So how can we have the Bount invasion acknowleged and all of the events in the SS arc have happened in the same continuity where Aizen's posse only just now turned traitor and Kariya is still alive? It doesn't make any sense
Back in the 10th Division Barracks, even though both Captain Hitsugaya and Lieutenant Hinomori were walking back to their place, but inside one of the arsonal rooms that has a lot of Soul Slayer Swords including Rangiku's Haineko weapon.
Rangiku's sword slayer Haineko then begins to glow from the blade of the sword as pillows of smoke begins to fly around in the room.
After couple of seconds, the smoke dies down and a human begins appearing as she looks around the room with the smoke clearing.
"Finally, I'm out of the sword and in the real world.", she said.
It was the Humanoid Spirit of Haineko.
Gee I wonder why she made an appearance

Sword boobs.
She escapes to go rejoin her owner and the story essentially abruptly cuts off there. I hope you had some fun on this journey through a budding young man's mildly immature obsessions! Until next time, adieu~

No comments:

Post a Comment